Lauren, the "Spirited Child"

For those of you who don't know. "Spirited" is a euphemism for "difficult". Lauren has been just that since day 1. First, and this was the fault of my own body, I couldn't breastfeed her. So formula it was! But Lauren's poor little tummy just couldn't handle it (also my fault probably, since I have tummy issues). So she developed horrible stomachaches, gas, and trouble going #2 basically since she was a few weeks old. We had to eventually switch her to Good Start formula, which I highly recommend. It has broken-down milk proteins that make it easier to digest. Anyway, so because of her stomach issues she could hardly sleep at all. The second we would get her down, she would lift up her little legs "mermaid-style" (since she was always swaddled) and scream and cry because her belly hurt. That is why during her MOTN (middle-of-the night) feedings, whoever did the feeding would be up for at least an hour each time. I got real comfortable watching late night TV for the first time in my life. Let's put it this way: I have never before or since watched The George Lopez Show. So while I know that all new moms go through that time of not sleeping, mine seemed never-ending. Put that together with some mild post-partum depression, and I was not a happy camper. When we finally got her on the Good Start, things improved a bit with her belly aches, but she still screamed and cried when she needed to poop, something which she is still uncomfortable with to this day. Whew! Or so we thought...

She even started sleeping much better around 2-3 months when we found the ingenius Woombie swaddler, and I managed to get her to nap in her crib for 40 minutes, 4 times a day. This was a huge improvement over ONLY napping in my or hubby's arms, or napping in any other setting for exactly 20 minutes at a time. And at night, we were able to sleep train her with the help of said Woombie. So we were even getting some sleep at night, with only 1 feeding to worry about on most nights. Whew! Or so we thought....

Fast forward a month, and we decide to take little miss to Florida to visit her grandparents (my parents, who live in FL 1/4 of the year). We end up driving because the stupid auto-train was cancelled due to snowstorms, and by the time we got there we were relieved to get a little help with Lauren. But we should have been tipped off by the first day. We handed 4-month-old Lauren to her grandpa, who was greeted with ear-splitting crying, screaming, and then Lauren freaked out so much she stopped breathing. I had to grab her back, blow in her face to make her breathe again, and basically not put her down for the entire 3 weeks we were there. I thought stranger anxiety didn't start until 9 months, all you child development experts! WTH? Of course, we figured it wouldn't be a problem, since she was so little and we were there, after all. But, no. She was having NONE of it. The big problem was that we had planned to go on a 3-day cruise for my friend's 30th birthday during that FL trip. I REALLY, to this day, don't know how we went, or how my parents (and brother) dealt with her during that 3 days. I somehow managed to get a little bit of enjoyment out of the cruise, but I don't know how everyone else did it. Apparently, my brother being there helped. You see, even though grandma & grandpa left in December (Lauren was born in Oct), Uncle J was still around, so I guess she was much better with him than my parents. Well, after we got back to the cruise, we figured we would just get through the rest of the trip and then go home and everything would be fine. OR SO WE THOUGHT! On the week we left, Lauren was screaming (as usual) in her crib when we tried to put her down for a nap. I went in there a few minutes later to find her facedown in the crib. She had learned how to roll over while in her Woombie, and was now stuck face-down. Well, that was the end of her short-lived good sleeping.

Fast forward to March, when we got home. Little Miss now insisted on being held for all naps. Wouldn't nap in her crib, bouncy seat, Pack n Play, or anywhere else. It was becoming an increasing problem, since her naps were getting longer, she was getting heavier, and...let's face it, I had to pee sometimes! I tried really hard to nap train her at about 6 months, but after over a week of no improvement (and a zombie-like, cranky baby who I didn't recognize), I gave up and figured out a way to get her down with me in MY bed. I had to stay with her pretty much the whole time but at least I was getting some sleep, too! Whew! Or so we thought...

One day when Lauren was almost 7 months old, she started fighting drinking her bottle. Since it was still her biggest form of nourishment, we got worried. Plus, she just didn't seem right. We took her to the doctor and they thought she had a throat infection (coxsackie virus). It should be gone in two weeks, they said. Well, the two weeks came and went. So we went back to the doctor, where they found no improvement. I told them that she REFUSED to drink her bottles. So the doc suggested I just mix milk in with all her food an hopefully she won't lose too much weight while getting better. I did as he suggested, and it was difficult to get her to eat such runny food, plus every bottle was a battle. Plus, I was just really worried because it was getting WORSE, not better. We finally had to go to the infectious disease doctor after over a month of her sickness. This doctor said the same thing, that it looked like coxsackie in her throat. She took a viral culture but nothing ever grew. We basically just had to change our entire lifestyle to deal with this for almost 2 months. While other moms were happily taking their 7-8 month olds to the library, shopping, and on other outings, I was stuck in the house with a cranky, sick baby who wouldn't drink. In the summer! My poor baby. When it was all over (she just got very...slowly...better), I at least got to pat myself on the back because Little Miss had not only NOT lost weight during the ordeal, but even gained a pound! Whew....this time, actually life got a little easier.

At 9 months, I felt like I could finally begin enjoying my life as a stay-at-home mom, and enjoy my baby. I started taking her to our local library, and never looked back. Things got gradually better from there. At 10 months I did manage to nap train her (10 horrible days, but it worked this time), and then we had a wonderful birthday party for her with 35 friends & family in attendance. Lauren was enjoying music class and library storytimes. Then, she learned to walk on her BFF Avery's birthday, at age 13 months.

Our two biggest issues that remain are separation anxiety and sleeping. Sleeping I have talked about in a previous post (Big Hug), and adding to that the fact that I still have to nap with her for the second part of her nap almost every day. Which leaves me very little time to myself. The separation anxiety has been pretty bad since about 15 months, when I took her to Florida for the second time. This time, we didn't have Daddy. Lauren freaked. She screamed until she vomited when I tried to get her to sleep in her crib there. I don't really want to relive the details, but let's put it this way: Grandma and Grandpa no longer want us to stay in their condo when we come visit and are renting us a house for next winter. Lauren literally was attached to my hip, or my leg, and slept with me in bed (well, SHE slept) for the whole 2 weeks. Since then, she has freaked out at the littlest thing, such that I can't even take a shower (even while she is with hubby) without a "big-hugs meltdown" (I saw that term on one of my message boards, and it is the perfect descriptor). So, obviously, she is not going to be left with any babysitters anytime soon (at least not while she is awake).

Since my parents returned from Florida in April, Lauren has really grown and matured. She now LOVES grandma, grandma, and Uncoo J more than ever (although still needs Mommy all the time). But she is so much fun now. We have a packed schedule of library events/storytimes, Gymboree, music class, and playdates. Now, if only she would sleep....or let me out of her sight for more than 3 minutes...

I know that everything is a phase and this one is, too. But I just wanted to take the time to explain why Lauren's babyhood so far has been, well, not what I expected. I know that someone always has it worse, and I know how lucky I am that she is (now) a healthy, happy, smart, and gorgeous almost-2-year-old. But, oh, boy does she have a mind of her own!